PM threatens comedian with giant pair of scissors

What do you call it when the Prime Minister of New Zealand tries to cut the ginger locks of local comedian Te Radar with a giant pair of scissors?

The opening ceremony of the 2014 Mystery Creek Fieldays, of course.

Prime Minister John Key declared the Fieldays open on Wednesday with the cutting of a red ribbon, which Te Radar said was “not symbolic.”

“I think David Cunliffe is around somewhere,” Te Radar said.

Fieldays CEO Jon Calder quoted his 7-year-old, some kids raised a flag, some older people raised a flag, and a suited-up soloist perfected the national anthem.

Key said he was delighted with the turnout of 21,353 people on the first day of the four-day event.

“It’s a magnificent event, we enjoy coming every year and it’s a great place to showcase both the breadth and depth of farming and also the innovation that we see,” said Key.

Fieldays is the largest agribusiness expo in the Southern Hemisphere, and this year it continues to grow, boasting 28 new outdoor agribusiness sites.

“Every year there’s something new that surprises me, and there’s a good mood and feeling here. I think farmers for the most part are doing well so they’re happy. You can always do better, but they’re doing well,” said Key.

Though he refrained from talking politics in his opening speech, afterwards Key outlined his concerns for the agriculture industry under a Labour-led government: “I think we have a slightly unusual situation here. Normally you have the centre right verses the centre left, this time you have the centre right versus the far left.

“There’s no doubt that Labour can’t form a government without the Greens, it won’t be possible, and we know the Greens’ feelings when it comes to agriculture,” he said.

“So I think they’re right in so much that if National was to loose the election there would be a very dramatic impact on the agriculture sector.”

When questioned on his attire bearing striking resemblance to those of the Rural Bachelors competitors, Key said, “It’s pure coincidence.”

National MP for Hamilton East and keen farmer David Bennett is set to make his appearance at the Fieldays on Saturday.

“The Fieldays is an important event for our region as a time for city and country to come together to celebrate our technology and leadership in agriculture,” he said.

When asked if he was going to be taking anything home from the Fieldays, Bennett said: “The new technologies and equipment are inspiring but I feel my buying options may be the more modest consumer goods.”