Yarns are spun and sparks fly
It’s week two, and once again the girls prove to be more interesting than the Bachelor himself.
Two weeks into The Bachelor NZ and once again we see Zac doing his thing in the ocean.
He’s a lifeguard in case you didn’t get the hint by now, and a big fan of scenic and romantic ocean shots.
This episode is the first single, and first group, date. Unsurprisingly, the girls are awkwardly and overly excited at the prospect of competing for a guy.
The first date goes to Jess, the tea girl who is not only the Edge fan fav, but also Zac’s. They go to great Barrier Island.
Jess admires Zac’s body, and they frolic in the waves. Jess talks about her ugly toes, and I instantly feel a connection, as I too have ugly toes.
They talk about food, and she gets a rose. He has felt the deeper connection.
The girls at home all fake excitement for Jess; reality TV literally thrives on pitting women against each other.
Taylar doesn’t pretend to be happy, though – you can practically see darkness radiating off her.
And then it’s time for the group date.
It involves four girls competing in surf life saving challenges – Molly Mariana Stephanie Nina are selected.
Zac tells them to bring aggression and leave it all in the water. They have to pretend to rescue drowning children – practice for the future I guess?
Molly falls over in the third race, and nobody is surprised.
Ally the yoga teacher wins the one on one with Zac. They go to a caravan in the middle of nowhere which would be creepy if it wasn’t on TV.
The girls all talk about how romantic it is, despite the fact the producers design the date.
The cocktail party rolls around, and the girls seem to forget that Zac isn’t the only guy on the planet.
They’re like giggly school girls who just found out boys don’t have cooties.
Lily gets some one on one time. Lily’s dog got attacked by a crocodile while living in Cambodia. The dog survived, an experience that is probably more enjoyable than watching The Bachelor.
Sophie interrupts the crocodile story to ask Zac his new year resolution and I’m mad for Zac because I want to know more about Lily.
The girls have a game plan about when to interrupt each other, which is a a ticking time bomb.
Sure enough Claudia turns up at her allocated slot and Sophie is not ready to give up. She’s holding on more than Lily’s crocodile.
Taylar talks about how she gave up her brother’s wedding to be here – ditching a wedding for your 1/16th of a boyfriend doesn’t add up to me.
Sparks fly between Claudia and Zac, except all they talk about is how she has an old head on her shoulders.
Zac is scared he’s wasting Mariana’s time because she is such a girl boss. He probably is, to be honest. It’s an awkward chat.
He comes to “spin some yarns” with a group of the girls and Nina realises she can’t “spin yarns on command” so she talks about starting a sheep sock company called Good Yarns. I’m attracted to this marketing idea, and would buy socks called this.
Katey talks, there is literal cicadas.
The rose ceremony commences and Zac thanks the girls for making his decision so hard, because he’s totally competing with 16 girls with a 93% of heartbreak and rejection…
Mariana is sent home, before Zac can waste any more of her time.
