Tim Tams and tears

The first kiss, the first meltdown and the final goodbye for one girl.

This weeks enlightening Bachelor episode sees Zac open his heart and that scandalous first kiss, including the actual bachelor this time. 

My  boyfriend came down from Auckland to spend some quality time with me tonight; he is now forced to watch the Bachelor with me while I drop subtle hints about how amazing their dates are.

Zac wears blue and blue in the first scene. I kinda like this as it reminds me of my dad who is famous for wearing either blue or green, and often with the top matching the shorts.

Claudia wins the single date,  and the invitation comes complete with a dress and shoes for her to wear. It’s quite a classy touch, but there is no sponsor message with the dress so I’m a little confused.

Claudia drives over in a Suzuki Swift, strategically placed in the show. Advertising: it was bound to be in here somewhere.

It’s a dancing date, which Zac has no experience in. That isn’t a surprise, but Claudia has been dancing since she was young.

“I just feel there’s something vibing between us,” says Zac.

Zac opens about a depression he got into after he got involved in a high court sport drama. This is a big moment. Kiwi males are known for not talking about this stuff, it makes him seem a little more human, and I’ve got to respect this.

They kiss, and it’s like 67 percent awkward, but 85 percent cute.

Claudia said she could not want anything else from a date. I’m just putting it out there that a puppy would have been a nice touch.

Meanwhile in the mansion: “There’s nothing really to her except those massive tits,” says Lucie, as if she can actually hold a meaningful conversation.

Bad girl Katey is after blood.

“If she does (kiss him), sleep with one eye open.”

Maybe she went on the show genuinely thinking he wouldn’t kiss the other girls?  I’m not really sure how intimidating this threat is? What can she do, shave off Claudia’s eyebrows?

The group date letter comes in a box with a giant Tim Tam cake and I stare at my boyfriend.

He informs me that I’m allergic to dairy and wouldn’t be able to eat the cake, but that’s not the point.

The group date is a kitchen cook-off, it’s Bachelor X Masterchef. A chance for a Zac to judge their wifey skills, but mostly a chance to advertise Tim Tams, the key ingredient to each dish.

Bel and Nina mostly just “taste test” the ingredients. I really like Bel: we both have rescue cats and like cherries, the basis of a solid potential friendship.

Katey and Lucia win the group date and get a joint date with Zac. They make a joke about being sister wives but I don’t really feel like it’s a joke.

Zac says that Katey and Lucia seem to click; he’s literally third wheeling.

“I’m a bit of an observer,” says Zac.

Katey says she believes in karma, and then tells us about how she stabbed her sister with a pen once. Maybe Claudia should watch out. 

Zac picks Lucia’s food out of her teeth, and its kind of gross. You don’t know when he last washed his hands.

The girls find out about Claudia’s kiss, and act like it’s more scandalous than kissing your boyfriend behind the school courts in high-school in year nine.

Katey makes a joke about kissing to Zac and he looks like he’s just seen a shark. Way to make an impression.

Zac gives Nina a mini counselling session, he’s really showing off that soft side tonight. It’s sweet, but watching it makes me quite uncomfortable. Nina’s so nice and I don’t want her to be sad.

Lucia’s bottom three and is already in tears. Considering she complained about the cry-babies last week, it’s hard to feel sorry for her.

Molly gets the final rose, which means Katey’s going home.  

She leaves in tears, and there’s a lesson for us all here.

Karma.