Fighting for a rose, literally

This week involves a date at the gym, the most awkward conversation of the season so far, and one bachelorette turning down a rose, but then accepting it. 

“The river runs through it” was the clue for the first date, but no-one could work out what that meant.

Turns out the date was the floating river markets; I could think of at least 78 ways to hint at this better.

Claudia says Carina has a bit of a flirty thing on with Zac, as if every other girl there hasn’t and I’m struggling to understand her sometimes.

Carina starts telling Zac about how some of the girls aren’t his type, his face is visibly shocked. I think the real issue here is the other girls in the house aren’t Carina’s type.

Cicadas chirp, Zac picks at his food, and Carina says nothing.

“I had a good time,”  Zac said.

He didn’t and no rose was to be seen, and now we all already know Carina’s going home this week. 

• Who left last week? Catch up here.

The group date is Muay Thai, because why not make the girls physically fight for attention? Oh, my lord.

“I could never hurt someone, I’m defenceless,”Bel says .

But I feel like if someone kidnapped her cat this would be a different story.

“Some one might die,”’ Lily says. And I do not doubt this.

There’s a 9/10 chance Claudia will take out any one else who looks at Zac.

But that’s not all, things take an icy turn as the girls sit in an ice bath. That’s right – whoever sits the longest, wins.

First the horse pee eggs, then scorpions, and now this? The Bachelor is feeling more like fear factor.

Sarah’s the first out, and this logical moves means she isn’t freezing cold. Hannah wins a coaching session, because exercise is fun…

They try to slow-mo the boxing to make it look romantic. I’m not convinced.

They share a sweaty kiss in the boxing ring, and I’m wondering if they realise they’re sitting in a boxing ring where everyone’s sweaty feet have been. I bet it smells. 

This cocktail party is brimming with emotions, and someone is about to break, as Bel and Hannah both look like they just found out their decision to go on this show means a 99 percent chance of a broken heart.

Zac calls Bel’s name in the rose ceremony, and she tells him she doesn’t know if she can take it.

They have a deep and meaningful chat, and the girls all sit around debating whether it’s for attention, and why she couldn’t have done it at the cocktail party. I think she should just leave, she has her cats, save yourself Bel. 

Zac convinces her to stay.

Carina is sent home, and it’s safe to say she won’t be terribly missed by the other girls.

Here’s hoping her Tinder game is strong.